Advertising


15
Jul 11

Why you need bra & panty in your next marketing strategy


*Before we proceed any further into this article, kindly look into your mind’s eye and honestly tell me you’re thinking about filing your taxes and making an honest living and not those luscious, drool-inducing, balls-tingling tits and ass.

Alright. Here we go.

The two most fascinating words of the male dictionary. Well, in my case, for obvious reasons but also because they’re purely a professional hazzard.

No.

I know what you’re thinking i.e. either this guy is a male stripper who grinds the bars for the rich-but-lonely-wives, or is a professional godzilla slinger aka hairy Mexican pornstar or one of those guys who’s drooling and ogling dirty pictures in the next window while conceptualizing this literary jaunt.

Or my favourite- he’s plain old horny and cheap like every other man except for Bill Clinton.

What? He was framed.

Although, those would appropriately fit my label, there’s more to a bra’s and panty’s obvious functionality.

One.

Today, because of clutter and competition, to engage the customer or as we, in the advertising industry put it, get the target audience enticed and hooked over the brand becomes a challenge.

Hence, you need your communication to be catchy.

*Like those tits you saw the other day, while you sat across the room with your girlfriend at a cafe. You remember she was wearing a white dress, her long brown hair were caught in the wind (even though this was indoors and there was no fan) and the fact that she itched her toe twice, shifted three times and did that thing most girls do- fixed her shirt because she could see the drool on your chin from across the room.

She was like a breath of fresh air. Thats recall.

Is your campaign engaging enough for the audience you have set out to have a conversation with?

Two.

Sampling the product so that a customer can get a flavour i.e. like a test drive or demo.

*You walk into a strip club, get a lap dance and the girl quietly slips a business card in your jacket pocket while you orgy over her assests.

Raise your hand if you agree thats some kick-ass one-on-one selling right there. Can your product demo deliver and capture the imagination of your customer?

Three.

Delivery. You’ve enticed the customer, given a kick-ass demo but when the panties come off, there’s a dirty bush and it smells of alcohol and a baloney sandwich that was on the bottom-most shelf of your friend’s fridge for two whole months.

Failing to deliver to the brand promise will result in losing the customer forever, garnering a bad word of mouth and, the most common of all, an erectile dysfunction- the business going kaput.

I also think a bra is much like the advertising campaign that entices and engages with the client, guest, customer or consumer and the panties become the after sales service.

How well and prepared are you to listen and meet the needs as well as evolve with time to keep things alive and fresh?

For instance, an advertising baba would do a like an under-the-waterfall-in-her-saree-slow-motion-dance for an Indian and a let-me-grab-that-pen-of-the-floor for you in a really tiny skirt for an American.

Disclaimer/Tip: After all, it ain’t rocket science dude, with one hand in his pant and the other on the mouse. Simply spread the index and thumb into a “U”, slide your hand up her shirt from behind, press down firmly on the straps and bring thumb and finger apart.

Voila. I said bra and panty.

Image: ffffound.com


19
Aug 09

Neil French – XO Beer

One of the greatest copywriters of all time is Neil French. He’s a great fan of the print medium – he even started the World Press Awards. And he usually writes long copy ads – which I simply love – that grip you from word one. I also find his work to be very up market and classy. I suppose its probably because he’s been choosy about his clients.

Some words of wisdom by Neil French himself:

Anyhow, here’s a look at a print campaign which was done as an exercise to prove the viability of the print medium. You can read more about that here.

You can view the full campaign here.


24
Jul 09

Intel Rockstars

Although I’m not a big fan of television, I occasionally – usually when the internet is down – watch the tube. The other day I happened to stumble upon this lovely ad by Intel. Check it out. I loved the part where he winks and points. It brings a smile to my face every time. The nerds must be proud.


13
Jun 09

NYC – The Big Apple

Ever wake up in the middle of the night, all sweaty, in shock – gasping for that last breath? And the words ‘NYC’ mutter out as you choke on your own saliva? Well, in any case, even if that didn’t happen; here’s the solution to all your going-to-NYC blues.

Now, planning a trip to the Big Apple just got easier. Simply go here. It simplifies all your conundrums in one neat easy package. The portal allows you to dig deeper and navigate endlessly around the corners, which, otherwise, would be impossible and downright nerve racking.

i-love-new-yorkLet’s say, you were planning a business trip, which was going to be more like – one day’s work, two days of exultant partying, and you were a mountain goat when it came to New York. In that case, you’d be in luck. All you’d have to do is go here. Done! The 2 days of partying, sightseeing, dining at your favourite restaurant with perspective clients – and acting like you practically lived in New York your whole life.

I suggest a similar approach for cities like Delhi and Mumbai. Especially now that the Common Wealth Games are around the corner. Ahem, ahem! Is the government listening?

Here’s the story behind it. Have a safe flight!